To many, gratitude is simply saying “thank you” to someone else for help or a gift. However, scientifically, gratitude is not an act but a valuable positive emotion. And this emotion alone can change your thinking (and therefore your life quality) for the better. Something on the esoteric side? No. Psychologists have done and continue to do studies that confirm: feelings of gratitude help fill life with positive emotions, establish relationships, improve sleep, and generally strengthen one’s mental health. But anyway, it’s better to learn to be grateful correctly.
In this article, we describe how the practice of gratitude works. Hint: no magic, just reasoned causation. We also share tips on integrating this simple psychological exercise into your daily routine.
Roots of positive feelings
By nature, we are closer to pessimism than to optimism. The fact is that our subconscious mind is naturally programmed to concentrate on the negative to keep us safe from possible threats. Our lives have changed considerably since the days of cavemen, but this function has remained. We have no difficulty in spotting what we don’t like. But what we value, we take for granted, and we don’t nearly draw pleasant emotions from it. That is why it is worth the extra effort to direct attention to positive life events and not to devalue the good things that happen in everyday life.
Gratitude is not an automatic response. Instead, it is a practice because it requires focus and regularity. It can also be partly a character trait, nurtured from childhood or acquired genetically.
Probably everyone has seen people happy at every moment or perpetually dissatisfied with something. It is the ability or inability to be thankful. For some, it is more natural; for others, it takes effort. Even anthropologists are convinced that gratitude is an evolutionary trait. It is the one that has helped humans survive by maintaining social relationships with others, feeling appreciation for the help, and giving help in return.
How does science evaluate gratitude?
Scientists suggest that this practice activates the brain’s reward center, changing how we see the world and ourselves. The point is that our brains repeat learned patterns. For example, a person who constantly worries about unfavorable outcomes may subconsciously process predominantly negative information. By practicing gratitude, we train our brains to focus more on positive feelings and thoughts.
In addition, when a person experiences gratitude, it activates certain areas of the prefrontal cortex responsible for reflection and future planning. At this moment, you synchronize the experience of the past, the feeling of the present, and the imagination of the future.
At the same time, gratitude reduces negative emotions such as envy or resentment. It is impossible to be grateful and envious at the same time. Notably, the regular practice of gratitude helps us to perceive negative situations as life lessons from which we can gain something rather than as causes for worry. Thus, grateful people generally are more stress-resistant and less likely to be depressed.
The following example demonstrates the effectiveness of this practice. American scientists experimented with several hundred volunteers. One group has given the task of recording in a diary all the events in a row. The second group had to record what caused negative emotions. The third one was recording moments that helped them feel a sense of gratitude.
The experiment lasted for two and a half months. When the results were summarized, it turned out that the participants of the third group felt happier than the others. They were happy to do routine work, less anxious about their health, and engaged in sports.
Scientists’ conclusion is unequivocal: when the brain is tuned to conscious gratitude and looking for reasons for it, there are positive changes.
Ways to practice gratitude…
Add the gratitude meditation to your daily rituals
Each morning focus your thoughts for 5–10 minutes on the things and people you appreciate. In the evening, before you go to bed, think about the positive things that happened to you during the day.
Focus on gratitude in a stressful situation
When you are stressed or overwhelmed, take a moment to pause and reflect on what is happening to you. Do some breathing exercises and try to see positive things in the current situation that you can be grateful for. This will help you deal with negative circumstances.
Don’t forget about “Thank You”
Thank others for everything they do for you. In the daily rush, good deeds toward us are taken for granted. If you pay attention to them, you may be surprised at how much people around care about you.
Come back to the Here and Now more often
So we move on to how important it is to be conscious and to notice the good things around us. Gratitude is a skill that you can develop and strengthen through mindfulness. When we pause and are in the present, it is easier for us to pay attention to the things and people for which we are grateful. A simple five-minute meditation on a timer or with Inite will work.
Write an “appreciation letter”
Write a gratitude letter to someone you rarely say “thank you” to but who deserves it. It’s up to you to send it or not. On the one hand, it’s certainly good for any relationship. On the other hand, fear of someone else’s reaction to the letter should not be a deterrent. It is important to write as sincerely as possible, from your heart, without thinking about whether you will be understood correctly. Make it a rule to write at least one such thank you letter monthly. From time to time, write such a letter to yourself.
Don’t have time to write? Just think of someone who has done something good for you today, and mentally thank them.
Start a gratitude journal
Write down all the things you are thankful for in life and people. You can do it daily, once a week, or monthly. An ordinary notebook will do. If you choose to record your thanks in the Inite app, you will receive Idea tokens for each entry: you can use them inside the app or on a cryptocurrency exchange.
… And tips on how to do it better
Find 80–100 reasons to be grateful
To prepare your mind for daily practice, it’s worth unwrapping your memories and associations. You only need to do this practice once. Try to first find and then write down at least 80–100 things you have ever appreciated. Write whatever comes to your mind, and don’t spend a lot of time thinking about it. As soon as you run out of fresh cases and feel a lack of thoughts, start remembering your childhood, adolescence, youth. Thank your parents for the long-awaited bicycle for your birthday, your schoolteacher for the tips, your classmate for helping you with your math test, your best childhood friend for sharing his toys, etc.
Don’t avoid details
Be as specific as possible when describing our visualizing your reasons for gratitude (“I’m grateful to my friends for getting me out to the movies” is better than simply “I’m grateful to my friends”). Also, thanking specific people for their actions is more effective than thanking them for something you like.
Segment your topics
If you write down gratitude notes every day or several times a week, it is possible that you will have to repeat yourself often. In that case, it may quickly become boring and eventually lose its meaning. Try to change your approach by devoting your reflections to different topics: relationships, work, children, and the world around you.
Set a daily minimum of reasons for gratitude
Try to focus on at least 5 positive cases daily. There may be more but in no way less. Don’t focus your attention on the grandiosity of the events. The people around you don’t have to give you cars, apartments, or trips to exotic countries to hear you say thank you. Thank people and the universe for the most insignificant little things. The boss wished you a good evening? Did your mother cook your favorite meal? Did your husband wash your car? Those are great reasons to be thankful, aren’t they?
Don’t forget to reread your entries.
Your gratitude entries are not for someone else but for yourself. This will make it much easier for you to see that your life consists not only of bad and negative aspects but also of positive and good aspects. To understand this, you need to regularly reread your gratitude journal!
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